Bad dates . . .

There was a cute guy in church we'll call John, you might know him, we're now married, and for the life of himself he couldn't sum up the courage to ask me out, it had only been about two months of flirting.

I got fed up with the game and decided to ask him out. I found a nice safe fireside to ask him to. I checked numerous times to make sure that it was a neutral, in other words, non-marriage related fireside before I invited him.

Guess what? The speaker in his opening said that he decided to change his topic and he was going to speak about marriage after all. HA HA HA.

To make things better, when it was over we ran into one of John's mission companions.

For the second date John invited me to a football game at USU. I thought he was cute and after the first date fiasco, I agreed and canceled my plans with Beth.

He wanted to take his old Nissan 1985 ZX. I had a brand new Jetta and much preferred the safety and assurance that came with driving it. We took the ZX, against my better judgement.

Just before Clearfield his car started over heating. He pulled off the road and opened the hood.

I could tell immediately that he had no clue whatsoever as to what he was doing, and I wanted to get going, so I called one of his friends, which also happened to be an ex-boyfriend, who knew how to fix cars. He told him some things to do and then we left.

(Poor John, could I have emasculated him anymore?)

Then when we reached Clearfield the radiator cap blew off and we were stuck sitting on the side of the road.

A cop came by about 20 minutes later checking to see if our car was on fire. Someone had called to report his car on fire, which thankfully it wasn't.

As fate would have it, we broke down right in front of a billboard with a picture of a womans chest that read: "Two good reasons for plastic surgery".

John called his brother Dave and they had to drive from Logan to Clearfield to pick us up, then they took us back to Logan for the game.

By the time we got there, I HAD to use the bathroom. I used the womens restroom as quickly as humanly  possible and then John said that he had to go to the bathroom. He was honestly gone for ten to fifteen minutes. I was worried he'd gone out a different door and I'd missed him. He finally came out and then we went and met a few of his friends and watched what was left of the game.  I think he was having stomach problems.

Because we weren't driving, I didn't have as much say as I would've had about where we went to eat. All three of them liked Subway and so that's where we went. I'm sure Subway is fabulous, but every time I try to eat their sandwiches, I gag with the first bite and I'm unable to eat any more. (Anyone that knows me knows that food is very important to me and I don't do well with missing meals.) I got the kids meal and ate the innards of the sandwich along with the stuff that came on the side. 

Afterwards we went to visit some of his friends, who were actually normal, this is a good sign. We had a nice time and then we drove home with is brother and wife. 

I wasn't so sure that he'd be calling for another date after that, but history tells the rest.

The results are in . . .

Smith's had a fabulous sale last week.

Powerade, 32 oz., was only $0.25 each!! I bought 8 cases, or 120 bottles.

So the total shopping trip included: two bags of oranges, two bunches of bananas, six boxes of cereals 120 Powerades, 6 apple juices, 3 candies and a 10 lb bag of potatoes for only $65!!

Happy Day!

This is what I found outside.

Madison came into the house naked from the waist down. She'd deposited her underwear, pants, boots and jacket at various places throughout the yard. She'd gotten wet, pee or water, still not sure.

The best part is that it was 43 degrees outside and while I was rounding up her clothes and getting new ones she ran back outside and made me chase her all over the yard while she squealed with delight!!

John was merely trying to take a cat nap on Sunday when the kids decided to help him get up and going. (Notice that he doesn't move position at all.)

They removed the covers and then proceeded to beat him about the body until he finally gave up and got up. I'd say poor John but I think I was egging the kids on, I can't be sure, but it might have happened.

Today we took Alexis back to the Dr. because she still had a slight fever and she's been so ornery it's unbelievable. They took blood because she's had a swollen lymph node in her neck for the past couple of months and coupled with her not feeling fabulous they figured it was time. Well, the blood work came back as normal. The only abnormal thing was some abnormal lymphocytes but he said that it isn't a cause for worry and they see it frequently in people who have mono. So, although it's not a conclusive diagnosis, it would explain a lot of things and I can do mono, especially since it's nearly over, at least we hope.

I have to mention that Alexis was so brave for the blood draw. She sat on my lap and she didn't cry or try to pull away or whine at all about any of it. We were very proud of her!!

I can't get this to center so deal with it.
This is what Madison and Drew do for fun.

This is what happens occasionally.

This is Madison showing us her daring she-woman skills.
She loves to crawl and jump and get into things that are naughty.

And this is how Madison communicates with  us.
This is a small sampling. This screaming can go for a good 30
seconds and then start right back up again for another round
if she's really upset.

St. Patrick's Day

We made some ooey gooey stuff, water, cornstarch and food coloring, and I let the kids have at it. I insisted that John try it too, and he did so reluctantly, but he actually ended up having more fun than the kids did. (There is no picture of Drew because he got bored and left within about 60 seconds.) Madison enjoyed smearing it everywhere and putting drops of it all over her clothes.

For St. Patrick's Day a leprechaun came and left a pile of goodies for the kids. Lots of green candy and some cold coins. The kids LOVED it. Drew and Alexis were up first and when the got to the door that had footprints up it, they couldn't figure out how they were supposed to climb up the door and walk on the ceiling, ha ha. Madison was so excited to see things on the ceiling as well, her first response was "ooooo". She LOVED the gold coins that were really chocolate, if we wouldn't help her, she would just bite through the gold until we did help. For dinner tonight, we're stealing ideas from cousin Jen and having green milk and green mac and cheese. (John and I will eat something else I think.)
I love this picture of Drew. He was so excited that there was candy to eat, before breakfast, that he opened his up and started licking his Jolly Rancher candy over and over again. He would stick his tongue out as far as it would go and then he would rub the candy on his tongue, quickly put his tongue back in his mouth, and then do it again. It was so exaggerated that I couldn't help but laugh.

Bad dates continued. . .

My parents last house was being finished, but the workers were oh so slow to finish up some of the projects. I came home from Boston to visit during this time and my mom wanted to see if I could encourage the guys to do some extra work that wasn't on the official "list" that the contractor had.  Strange how my being around the job site increased worker attendance and productivity.

Once the word got out that there was a cute twenty something year old girl on the job site, the man in charge of the crew actually showed up and amazingly found things to work on in the house. (We'll call him Jake.) We weren't complaining. At least things were getting done.

He had a birthday coming up and invited me to his birthday party. I reluctantly agreed.  I didn't know him from Adam, but still accepted the invite.

He came and picked me up and told me that his Tongan friends were roasting a pig in their backyard and that's what we were going to be doing. One thing I know is that you don't want to be the only white person in a crowd of Tongans, it's awkward at best. He told me his parents were coming, his dad was a Bishop, and that there were a number of kids that would be there as well. I still felt odd but how bad could it possibly be with his parents there? Ha 

There were kids there, but they were all kept in the house as his friends were all drinking and they didn't want them around.

First problem - I didn't have a car. Second problem - his truck was his baby, he'd already told me numerous times that no one else had ever driven his truck, it just wasn't allowed.

His friends were pretty drunk when I got there, I'm pretty sure the party started a couple of hours prior to my arrival, and they were still going strong on the beers. They weren't quiet and they most certainly were not acting like gentlemen, I was the only girl outside. I finally got fed up with all the comments and innuendos and escaped to the inside, which was awkward as well. The kids finished what they were eating and then left and the two women there were not overly friendly to say the least.

Jake's parents came inside to meet me, awkward again, and then they left the party. They'd only been there for about ten minutes, I about died.

So there I sat in some woman's kitchen, who I'd never met, with a bunch of drunk guys outside getting more and more drunk. What the heck does one do?

After an hour of being at this lovely party, Jake came in and gave me the keys to his truck and told me he'd call me when he was done. I was so excited to leave I nearly ran to the truck.

I went to my friends to hang out until he called me, I figured it would be about two to three hours. Half an hour after I'd left he called to say he was done. I was so confused I asked him a few times if he was sure he was ready to leave. The pig wasn't finished and the cake and song obviously hadn't been done either.

When I picked him up he said that after I'd left he'd ripped them all a new one and that he was leaving the party early because they were all acting like such buffoons. I was shocked.

You're probably thinking that with the way it turned out it wasn't that bad of a date, but it wasn't over.

He had called a few other friends to go do something and so we were meeting up with them. His friends lived in a mobile home in Payson, enough said. Neither of them had dates and they were playing cards. I figured that cards couldn't be too bad, until they dealt my hand. They were playing cards with nude women on the back. So, I sat on the nasty old couch and watched them play.

Had the night ended there I would've been so excited, but no it still wasn't over.

I'm pretty sure he could tell I was uncomfortable with the situation AGAIN. I'm not one to keep quiet when something is bothering me and even though it was his birthday and I was obviously the reason that he was having to leave parties, but I couldn't pass up the snide remarks about the playing cards.

So, he took me to his house, which was also his parents house, which made me feel much better. He put on a movie that he LOVED . . . American Outlaws. Honestly, one of the longest most boring western shows ever created.

Overall, the fact that he respected me enough to leave both of his parties was very kind. The fact that he thought that I'd actually enjoy either of those parties was annoying. And showing me one of the most boring movies in the world afterwards? Overall I felt bad for him and for his birthday being a stinky one, but I was so glad when he finally took me home.  

Avoiding laundry

Drew came into the laundry room and told me he had a "square butt". I didn't get it until he turned around. When Alexis found out that I was taking pictures of it, she joined in the fun.

This is what laundry looks like after you've had four tests in one week.

(It's all clean, if that makes it any better.)

Instead of folding it, I let the kids do a craft, which meant I had to supervise and thus I was unable to fold it.

From left to right: Alexis', Drew's and Madison's.

This is the finished product. It was funny to see how each kid responded to the directions.

I gave them some green strips of paper to cut into smaller pieces. Then I put glue on the clover and told them to put their green pieces on.

Alexis took forever to cut hers out and then she quickly put them on her clover. 

Madison tried to cut hers to no avail. She then put two pieces on and left the table to go make a mess elsewhere.

Drew cut some of his pieces, but was more interested in making them big versus small. He was the first one ready for glue and the last one to leave the table. He was meticulously putting his green pieces on and trying to make them fit like he would a puzzle. He was so frustrated that he would have a piece in place and then he would find one that would fit better. Then he would have to pick the glue off his fingers before he could move onto the next piece. This would take so long to do though that he would literally have to rip the piece off that needed to be replaced. After he placed six, yes six, pieces I stepped in to help him.  

I never fully understood why they had locking wheels and seat belts on high chairs. Until Madison came along. One minute she is sitting still and the next she is sitting on top of or climbing over it and doing whatever it is she wants. She has also learned how to swing her legs such that she can move her high chair to where she wants it to go. She has so much energy I'm amazed that she doesn't get more injuries than she does.

Alexis' self portrait with the new camera.

I let Alexis take the new camera outside to take pictures of the kids playing. (Don't tell John, he won't be happy, it's brand new.) I think she got some good pictures!

Alexis informed me this week that the van has three more seats, so we can have three more kids. She reasoned that we not only have room in the van but we also have enough mommies and daddies to take care of that many kids. I wonder if John and I would truly survive six children. All of the kids are planning our next pregnancy already, they want a brother for Drew.

Worst dates

John and I were talking about past dating experiences, especially the bad ones and he thinks that I should write some of them down so that they aren't forgotten. I thought I'd start off with the absolute worst dating experience I can remember.

I was taking a general music class at then UVSC and that is where I met HIM. I don't remember his name and lets be honest I don't want to. He asked me out numerous times, to which I politely declined and changed the subject as quickly as possible. My car was in the shop one week so my Mom had to come pick me up from school. He decided to walk me to where Mom was picking me up, no matter how much I protested. Then he insisted that he walk me outside to her. I was frustrated but how do you tell a nearly 200 lb guy that is six foot something that he's a retard?

But wait, it gets better. . . 

When we get to the car he leans in the passenger side window and proceeds to ask my mom if he can take me on a date. (What the $#%@ was he thinking?) I was standing behind him shaking my head as violently as possible. But what does mom say? She tells him yes and the date is set right then and there. I could've killed all of them.

So mom takes me a drops me off at his house, because my car is still in the shop, the night of the date. Not only is he not ready, but he's working on his car stereo. So, he makes me wait with his dad in trash-ville USA while he goes and showers. Can we say awkward? 

. . . wait for it, we're not done yet.

When he finally finishes we get into his car and leave. You know that creepy feeling you get when you're with someone and you don't know how the hell you're going to get out of it, I was there times about 20.

He hands me his CD case and tells me to pick a CD. I thumb through it and the only thing I find worth listening to is The Beastie Boys. When I hand it to him, he tells me that girls can't listen to them because it is inappropriate. (Are you joking?) So, no music. Somehow we got to the point where he tells me that he has the Priesthood and so I have to listen to him. That went over like a lead balloon. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm not going to take that and not say anything. I informed him that even with the Priesthood he wasn't getting into the Celestial Kingdom without a wife, so he'd better think twice before using that line again.

Don't you think he's set up the date well?

He takes me to Olive Garden, somewhere near Salt Lake City. It was prom night and there were large numbers of people all dressed up and looking great. We were sitting there eating and he signals for the lady that sings to come over and sing to us. (Again, are you joking? But it gets better.) She starts singing and then HE starts singing with her, to ME. I could've died, I would've crawled under the table and hidden had I thought that at the very least half the restaurant wasn't watching me do it.

FINALLY we get out of the restaurant. Now I'm stuck in the car with him AGAIN. We drive to watch the symphony at Temple Square and he parks at the top of a hill three blocks away, never mind that I'm actually wearing heals, which I told him, but he obviously didn't care. We get into the symphony and he falls asleep. I understand not being able to stay awake, if you're an old man, but really? Then he tops it off by snoring. Yes, he was snoring in the middle of the symphony. 

Okay, you're thinking to yourself, that's the worst date ever? It wasn't over. Keep reading.

We're heading back to Utah Valley and home, sweet home. But he decides to stop at his sisters house and introduce me. She was newly married and I still don't know why we were going there. He knocks a few times and when she doesn't answer he tries the door handle. I stopped him, who in their right mind walks into a newly married couples house? He agrees to leave and I'm getting excited that I get to go home. 

But we're not done. . . 

He gets on the phone and calls his friends to meet him at another friends house. So, we go and meet ALL his friends and their girlfriends/wives. They all sit in a circle and I'm the center of attention, awkward. We were stuck there for over an hour and all I wanted was to go home. Finally he takes me home and tries to walk me to the door, I avoided anything he was thinking of by basically shutting the door in his face. I ignored his phone calls for the next three weeks and that class as well.

I've seen him a few times since with someone I assume is his wife and each time I think to myself that she's either completely miserable or a raging idiot for marrying him in the first place.

Seeing the newest member of our family!

On Friday we had an appointment with the Dr. to see how baby was growing and find out what we were having. . . it's a girl!

More importantly, she's a healthy little one, weighing in at 8 oz. and measuring in at 17 weeks and 3 days, so smaller than the 18 weeks that she is, but her mommy isn't complaining! There's no picture to post because she was being a stinker and didn't want to get a profile picture or open her legs for any pictures.

For dinner we met my Mom's Dad, Fred and wife Lois as well as her brother Jim and wife Janet, Cheryl & family and of course Jana for dinner at Chuck-a-Rama. Can you tell by my face that it's one of my favorite restaurants? The kids get full though and we can't complain about that.

Aydian was so excited to see Drew he came and sat at our end of the table right next to Drew!

Madison and Irelynn

(Madison loves to hold babies, no matter how close to her size they are.)

All the cousins on my side, minus Brayton.

(L to R: Drew, Alexis, Aydian, Madison, Corwynn holding Irelynn and Ryley)

(They made us take a picture before we could leave. Notice I'm the only one not looking at the camera to the left. Also we would've done our hair and gotten dressed had we realized we'd have to take a picture.)

Saturday morning we went to Grandpa Rod's for breakfast with Brixton, Cheryl & family.

The kids loved playing with their cousins and Drew and Aydian were sad when play time came to an end.

The infamous Madison face. 

She's not mad, but she loves to make this face at us.

(Alexis and George Davis playing Dinosaur Train games on the internet.)

For lunch on Saturday my high-school friend Michelle and I went to lunch minus husbands and most of the kids, we took her new baby Corrine (I don't know if I spelled it right, hopefully I did). We had fun eating our food and not having to share it with any little people, or big people!

The husbands went to McDonald's with all the kids and from the pictures John took, it looks like they were having lots of fun! We enjoyed seeing our friends and having fun!

A ridiculous picture but we were excited to see the odometer hit 33,333!

We took this on the way to dinner Saturday night with John's family. Go figure that the most picture happy family is the only one that we didn't pull the camera out at. The kids loved playing with their cousins and throwing pillows at Uncle Dave's head.

Finally on Sunday after we'd gone and visiting our New Zealand friends and enjoyed just chatting for a while, we went to meet Brayton. He's only 7 lbs 9 oz, which is nearly 2 lbs heavier than my little babies, but I can't imagine a baby being any smaller. I loved holding him (and knowing that I could give him back if he needed fed, changed or was just fussy).

And then, oh happy day, we got to come home! I can't wait to put the kids to bed and get some sleep myself.